It's the eve of Sophia's baptism. Well it was. Now it's past midnight, so technically it is her baptism day. And even though things have been beyond busy, I had to take a moment to write the thoughts of my heart. I admit there's a tummy-churning mix of excitement, anticipation, nerves and hope. I know I am a far cry from a perfect mother. I get overwhelmed easily. I expect too much from myself and my kids. I would rather do pretty much anything over dishes or laundry. But it helps so much to know that I have never been on this parenting ride alone. And not because I am married, although that helps, but because Sophia is God's daughter first and I am just His helper. He tells me what to do for her, and I've tried my best to do it.
You can't cram getting ready for baptism and that covenant with the Lord, but you don't have to if you are doing the simple every day and weekly things He's asked us to do. Saying prayers. Going to church on Sunday. Reading our scriptures together, even if it's just one. And even though it's been hard, we have tried hard to do these things.
This week we had a special Family Home Evening night learning about baptism and receiving the Gift of the Holy Ghost. Of course Chad practiced dunking all the kids and a rush of memories poured into my mind as I remembered doing the same thing with my Daddy in our old living room. I said the same things to my kids as he did to me. "Remember to bend your knees and don't let your feet lift off the ground. We baptize by immersion."
Then Sophia did. My precious little Sophia. She has come so far. She is a very free spirit. She is smart and intelligent. She has a beautiful heart. There are some things we still don't know about her as far as possible Aspergers and some ticks, and the ADHD and Oppositional-Defiance is hard to handle at times. But she is a gem. She is a jewel. She is more precious than rubies.
Watching her get "dunked" by her Daddy I could see myself in her and my Dad in Chad, and also the newness of this next link of family covenants. Another generation of baptism, preparing her for the temple and those same covenants that make our families eternal.
I am so thankful that between the meltdowns and depression, fear and doubt, I have kept going with trying to teach my children the Gospel. To learn about the Holy Ghost, my dearest fried, I put the following items in a sack and let the kids take turns pulling items out, each representing something the Holy Ghost does for us...
Even Sammy wanted to try.
1. A blanket because the Holy Ghost can give us warm, tender feelings.
2. A phone because the Holy Ghost speaks to our mind and hearts.
3. A stuffed animal because the Holy Ghost comforts us.
4. A picture of friends because the Holy Ghost can be our constant companion and greatest friend.
5. A light bulb because the Holy Ghost can give us ideas and bring things to our minds.
6. A red flashlight because the Holy Ghost can give us feelings to help us STOP doing something that can hurt us or is bad for us.
7. A compass because the Holy Ghost helps us stay on the right path and choose the right way.
8. A schoolbook because the Holy Ghost helps us learn.
I chose 8 items to remind them that at that age you can receive the gift of the Holy Ghost. We read some scriptures relating to the items too, easily found in the topical guide. But that can be a lot for the little ones so we didn't do a scripture for each item in the bag, just the scriptures I felt they would get the most from.
It is so rewarding to learn as a family. Was it hard to get everyone into the living room for FHE? Yes! Did the kids want to play in the backyard instead? Yes!! Did I think very seriously about throwing in the towel and just canceling? Oh, YES!!! But did we end up growing spiritually and having a good time as a family? YES!!!!!!!
I promise you that as you make time each day to read a scripture, say family prayers and have weekly family home evening you WILL know peace. You will have comfort at these crucial times when your kids have reached milestones, knowing you have done all you can. And though I may lose a little sleep over my anticipation for tomorrow, it's not because we haven't prepared her. We have. And that is a priceless gift to both her and to my own sense of peace. The Gospel is true!!! Love, Eva
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