Why Do We Even Bother??? Becuz It's ALL WORTH IT! :)

"Why do we even bother?"

I remember sometimes hearing sentiments like this growing up "Why do we even bother going to church when we just fight while we try to get ready?"  With three sisters sharing one small bathroom, getting ready for church wasn't easy.  Confusion and rushing could easily lead to sartastic remarks and bad feelings as we tried to pile into the car and make it to Sacrament meeting on time.  "Why bother...?"  The same feelings existed when we tried having family scripture study or Family Home Evening.  If it took yelling and arguing to get us all in one room, how could we possibly feel the Spirit these activities were supposed to bring?  "Why bother?"

Just now I sat down for a few minutes with my kids to read some stories from The Friend.  My daughter sat beside me ready to listen while my son was jumping off the couch, using a tie as a rodeo whip and making a general mess.  He finally calmed down for a moment while we tried singing "I'm Trying To Be Like Jesus."  Getting through one verse took several tries as there were questions about the picture by the lyrics, stories to tell about what happened at school that HAD to be discussed right then, and a question to ask that they couldn't remember, which caused a momentary tear fest.  Soon after that my 5-minutes-earlier-listening, snuggling daughter said "I don't like sitting here reading all day long and just looking at pictures and talking all day."  Ugh.  When is it naptime?!  For ME I mean!

Part of me wanted to be offended, and kind of was, but another part of me knew I needed to practice what I had just sung about.  Because why do we even bother to go to church, study the life and ways of Christ, say prayers or sing hymns aloud and in our hearts?  So at moments like this, when we need it most, we can have His Spirit with us and His love for His children brought to our remembrance.

I put my arm around my daughter and told her quietly:

"What I teach you from this magazine are the most important things you can know.  They are more important than what you learn in school.  They will help you be nice.  And when we sit together and read it is special, important time together.  OK?"

OK, she answered.  That was it.  No melt down, no screaming, no regrets.  We had our quiet moment together.  For one small minute we both felt the Holy Ghost that I had been trying to teach them about.

When I lay awake at night wondering, worrying about my efforts as a parent it doesn't take me long to feel pacified.  Not because I am a perfect parent (I can assure you that's not the case!) but because I know I am teaching my kids to choose the right, be kind and feel the Spirit.  There is nothing more important for them to know, and even at ages 4 and 6 they are learning it.  I will not be there for every big decision in their life.  I know that sometimes, like I have, they will choose poorly.  But I do believe they are learning the tools to help them make things right when they've done wrong, love their fellowman and serve their neighbor.  And because of that, I can sleep peacefully.

Why do we even bother when it is so hard and challenging to choose the right, be at that church meeting or say that family prayer?  Because we've covenanted to.  Because the Lord needs us to.  Because Satan is doing all he can to stop us and but he is not going to.

Next time you are laying awake at night worrying or you find yourself thinking "Why do we even bother?" consider this passage from an amazing book titled "Everyday Battles: Insights For Latter-Day Saint Women" by Bette S. Molgard:

"...Satan is painfully aware of the eternal difference any one of our righteous sisters can make while carrying out her individual mission.  Keep in mind, "Out of small things proceedeth that which is great" (D&C 64:33).

Let's take, for example, the problem Satan sees with allowing one righteous mother to raise five children free of his constant distractions.  Her strength and testimony passed on to subsequent generations.  If each of those children had four children, and each of the subsequent generations did the same, look what happens to that small beginning: first generation: 20 children; second: 80 children; third: 320 children; fourth: 1280 children; fifth: 5120 children; sixth 25, 600 children; seventh; 102,400 children; eighth; 409,600 children; ninth: 1,638,400 children; tenth generation: 6,553600 children!  That doesn't count spouses, missionary converts brought into the Church (which also multiply exponentially), and people whose lives they touch in righteously living the gospel...There is no limit to what any Latter-day Saint woman can do as she righteously fills the measure of her creation."

That is why I bother trying and that is why it's all worth it.  I'm grateful my parents "bothered trying" because even if they didn't accomplish all they wanted to as a family they taught me enough to help me gain my own testimony and love sharing it with others.  The Gospel is true!  What you do every day to take care of and love others is amazing and valuable in the eyes of the Lord.  Never belittle or question how crucial your part is in His plan.  Love, Eva

"Marching" On...Teaching Integrity To Our Kids!

Well, as you might already know our family has had a wild past several months!  With a job change and move mostly out of the way though (the boxes left to unpack can wait!), I am so excited to be able to focus more on spending time with my kids, and teaching them good values.  My forwarded mail is just arriving, and seeing The Friend in my mailbox was a reminder that even with crazy schedules and moves, I have to make time for teaching my kids!

We all learn by repetition, so lately I've been focusing on trying to tell stories with the same theme and then point out those principles whenever there is an opportunity.  The Friend has some great helps this month. Hhere are the 7 I've used so far...


Decide Right Now by President Monson focuses on choosing now, before the situation comes up, what good choices you're going to make.  There's a little worksheet where kids can write if they are going to say "yes" or "no" when faced with tough choices from their friends.  We took the game a step further with some role playing which was super funny.  Watch for that video soon!


That article also talked about being good 100% of the time, so choosing the right "all the time" has been a phrase we've used a lot this week. 

When my daughter wanted to do a craft and saw we had paper plates she insisted on making her trademark lion mask. :)  Since the idea of being good "all the time" was already on our minds it was easy to bring up the story of Daniel in the Lion's Den.  He prayed and did what was right even when it was illegal with the penalty of death!  We watched the short video clip the church was for the story on their website.  I even put it on the desktop so it was easy for the kids to click on it and watch it on their own.  Then we printed out the story and made a booklet for them to read which was super cute!  Michael was excited to have something that was small, important and his.  We even did some more role playing of that story.  I might post that video. LOL

I pulled open my Friend to the story titled What Scared The Barnyard Roosters and the Bright Idea art page illustrating Joshua 1:9.  Now, not only the idea of choosing the right was relevant but also praying for strength.  This cute story about the little boy with the chickens was our bedtime story again tonight, and the kids are learning they can pray if they need help or are scared.

The Coat is another wonderful story that we watched the video of online.  The video is beautiful and really brings home that message of doing good all the time, even when it's hard.

Since that was a lot of doctrine, we did some of the game pages this week too.  Saturday is A Special Day was fun.  I gave my son more things to find after we found the items the page called for.  Then we looked at the Bulletin Board section.  It actually had a part about eating healthy which gave us another opportunity to learn about Daniel and when he refused the king's food and wine.  Once again being good "all the time" came up, are we all seeing the pattern? :)

Finally, I had to share the story Abu Learns Honesty with them because it was right in line with the theme of The Coat, Daniel and the Lion's Den, and President Monson's story.  We need to choose the right "all the time."  And when we don't, well, that's why we have a Savior, so we can repent and make it right.

I know that by being a more dedicated, teaching-oriented parent I learn more.  The short, true stories in The Friend and the scriptures touch my heart every time I read them.  My kids are so used to me "happy crying" because I can't help but feel the Spirit and feel blessed that I have this little window of time to share these principles of faith and hope with my kids, and myself.  And the repetition is working.  We are starting to understand these concepts together.  
March is still early, spring is upon us and it is a time for new beginnings!  I hope you can find some time to share these stories with your little ones.  If you have to, read them on your own and bring them up when the topics come up.  The opportunities will be there if we are prepared and ready because this is the Lord's work.  We are his missionaries in the home and he supports us!  Remember, the gospel is true!  Love, Eva